Hi-Lights

If we are to raise kids who can think and act ethically, we don't begin with the thinking or the acting. We begin with caring- caring for our children and nurturing their innate ability to care; helping them to see themslves as both lovable and loving. Such an ethic is primarily about relationships, not principles or virtues, or values. It is not that principles, virtues, and values have no purpose. They do. In an ethic rooted in deep caring, they are in service to and at the service of that caring.-Barbara Coloroso 2005

Belonging Skills

Belonging is something that is often applied to things. "Who do these mittens belong to." We think as of relations as something that requires choice - not skills. It may be the case that we come pre-wired with a pre-disposition to "belonging" or that early in life we have such experience in the main that teaches us belonging skills.But it is equlayy obvious that not all learn such skills or alternatively acquired other traits that keep them from "belonging".

As suggested by the fox in Saint Exupery's the Little Prince belonging or establishing ties takes time, it takes being 'tamed'

Shyness can be defined as being fearful about meeting people and suffering discomfort in their presence.(1)

Loneliness is experienced by people who feel that their relationships with others are less satisfying than they would like them to be. Loneliness is related less to the quantity of personal interactions than to their meaningfulness. (2)

References

Brassell, William (1994) Belonging, A Guide to Overcoming Loneliness, Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications

Kleinke, Chris L. (1986) Meeting & Understanding People, New York: W.H. Frreeman and Company

Notes

Kleinke Page 2

Kleinke Page 3